To eat or not to eat

Some of my discoveries in America have been food-based. Be it cooking at home or just eating out, I have been doing more of both. Husband dear and I have had a few nicer, healthier experiences when eating out, but mostly eating out has meant grabbing something on the run. I have familiarized myself with quite a few fast food places, including taco bell, chilli’s (it probably doesn’t count as fast food but it’s cheap and not necessarily healthy), the mexican food van on the street (i loved it!) and Subway. Previously I had only been acquainted with McDonald’s (since it is one of the few American fast food places open in Geneva), Burger King (but I never ate there), and also Subway (because it exists in England). Subway was a part of my regular diet during law school and so was Pret a Manger (which I really like and recommend for its healthy and green ethos), pad thai and doner kebabs with fries and coke. Anyway fast forward to post-law school when I lived at home, didn’t eat out much and lost a bunch of weight… here’s the kicker… without even trying.

Fast-forward to now and I put it on again. Need I say more? It’s not just the eating out, did I mention I enjoy cooking? I discovered that I even like to bake. Cakes and such of course. I have used the egg, flour, sugar and butter combination so many times I feel guilty stocking my shelves with these things. The first cake I baked was a tres leches for husband dear’s birthday. It also lots of heavy cream and sweetened milk to boot. It was delicious here’s a picture.

The chocolate cake I made wasn’t as amazing as I had imagined but we still ate a lot of it. I also remembered reading about a very quick brownie-cookie recipe that would satisfy a chocolate desert craving quickly and dug it up from Ximena‘s blog. (Check out her 15 minute emergency brownies.) Yes it is awesome and you don’t even have to wait 30-40 minutes! It bakes in 6 mins flat. I used chocolate powder instead of real milk chocolate the first time and it came out tasting of dark chocolate. The next time I used the real thing and added only a bit of the powder and the batter turned into goop that would not go on to the cookie sheet in cookie-sized dollops. So I just poured it in and let it bake just like that, and even though I took out a large flat amorphous … chocolate thing from the oven, it was delicious. Husband dear and I finished it in one sitting.

In the spirit of cutting back and going back to that ideal weight again, I have been exercising and setting some goals. However, as I was eating my gourmet burger (yes it was gourmet and not fast food, with delicious avocado slices in it to boot) with fries and blue cheese, I realised that I really didn’t want to give up nice food. I mean I thought I could but it is very nice to go to a nice place and truly enjoy a burger or a nice Italian pizza. The real thing at a nice Italian restaurant in Geneva (not the crap they have for delivery in the US, yes I said it). And the real deal in pasta. I love pasta and tomato sauce, and pesto sauce and linguine. And seafood and Thai and noodles. And bread and cheese and croissants, pains au chocolat, pain aux raisins and pain a la vanille.

Well this post was supposed to be about something else entirely. It is a subject kind of related to food but in a diametrically opposite way. It’s supposed to be about jeans. Jeans that don’t fit. I have jeans, office pants, a couple of skirts, some dresses, shalwar kameezes, shirts, tops and even underwear that doesn’t fit. I may have held on to it for too long now. I haven’t shopped properly in ages because I have been waiting to get back to my old weight to do so. So I have a limited amount of clothes that I do wear and that is just beginning to seem ridiculous now. I have passed my deadline to get rid of these things once but I never did, some of those clothes are brand new and so pretty. If I became a stick again, they would look so awesome on me. However, the chances of my fitting into the jeans I wore when I was 19 are quite slim. Should it hang in the closet like a spectre of the past and a mockery of the present? But I loved those jeans then and I still do.

I am wondering, should I just let go of the idea of losing weight and just embrace the new one? I am by no means overweight and still intend on exercising and eating healthily most of the time. Just no longer with the intention of fitting into those clothes. The super-organiser in me wants to pull out everything that doesn’t work anymore and donate and/or sell it. It will be a weight off my shoulders if nothing else. What do you think dear reader? Ever given up on that new year resolution so resolutely so early on in the year?

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